Late Rent

I concede that I have many character flaws; however, being blatantly irresponsible is not one of them. I pay my bills on time, attend my appointments, and even do my visiting teaching. Thus, I was deeply disturbed when I received a notice in the mail entitled, "Demand for Possession, Non-Payment of Rent." Apparently, for the first time in my life (if my memory serves me right) I forgot to pay rent. Given the cacophony in my brain of late, I'm not terribly surprised. And I'm sure it's cause for great distress when a landlord doesn't get rent. But still -- was it really necessary to threaten to throw me off the manor?! The notice informed me that I "must do one of the following within seven days from the date this notice was served: a. pay the rent owed or b. move out or vacate the premises. If you do not do one of the above, your landlord/landlady may take you to court to evict you." Then there's a big black box in the bottom of the form entitled, "How to get legal help."

(Brief philosophical aside: Why do people so often rush to harsh judgment? My adviser speaks of "generosity of spirit" - a virtue that seems to be desperately needed in our society. It's a beautiful thing when someone gives you the benefit of the doubt -- and usually goes further in encouraging positive behavior and attitudes than threats and punishment.)

I confess that I rushed to harsh condemnation of my landlord after receiving this not-so-friendly-practically-arrest-warrant. In fact, my first response was to write a scathing letter -- which thanks to the better judgment of a friend, I chose not to send. Instead, I enclosed the following poem with my rent check.

Do you think I've just increased my chances of eviction? (Perhaps if I do have to live on the street, I can make a few dollars as an itinerant poet?)

An Ode to Form MCL 600.5714(1)(a): Demand for Possession

I once had a horrible week -
The future was looking quite bleak.
With troubles galore,
and patience no more,
I caused my dear landlord to freak.

My timing for crisis was poor –
(couldn’t be worse, to be sure).
The first day of May?
You’ve got rent to pay!
But all reason went right out the door.

Up till now, I had been a good renter
when I suddenly hit a nerve center.
“Get out the big guns!”
“What if she’s out of funds?!”
cried the boss when the room he did enter.

Swift action is urgently needed,
“Arrest her!” he fervently pleaded.
“This person’s a crook!”
“It’s written here in this book!”
“The deadline for rent’s been exceeded!”

Unaware that I’d made a mistake
and was acting a lot like a flake,
I felt very alarmed
(not a tiny bit charmed)
when the “notice” did cause me to quake.

My rent plus a late fee’s enclosed
-my sin is now fully exposed.
I’ll not do it again.
(Amen and amen!)
And as penance this poem I’ve composed.